Four Fun Things to Do during Lunch


Cael Baumgarten, Copy Editor

What used to be the highlight of every school day is now a joyless ritual that we are provided by obligation. What used to be a moment of respite amid a ceaseless stream of instruction is now a minor interruption that reminds us of how long classes really are. Despite its best efforts, like playing G rated movies from 15 years ago, and that’s it, Olathe South’s lunchroom remains a desolate artifact of a happier time. Maybe you’re one of the lucky ones who has a good companion in your fourth or fifth hour, or maybe you find yourself relegated to the corners of the South Gym or the 800 hall pretending to be anywhere else. If the latter option sometimes describes you, then you’ve come to the right place. Here are some things to do during lunch to help you feel like you’re not involved in a psychological experiment.

Go to the bathroom. I don’t care if you don’t have to pee or poop, just go to the bathroom. The inside of a stall is so much more quiet and peaceful than the cacophony outside. On the toilet, you don’t have to worry about overhearing conversations about your peers’ classes, families, or disagreeable political opinions. All you have to watch out for in there are pieces of fruit left on the ground and people crying. If you find that the main bathrooms are closed off to you because of your gender, which happens surprisingly often, just incite a riot.

Re-download “2048.” I didn’t think the day would ever come either, but these are desperate times. There are more than 30 days left of school; with 25 minutes of lunch time each day, that’s more than 12 hours you could dedicate to mastering that timeless relic of 2014. Think about how cool you’ll feel when you finally reach that coveted number. Think of all the wealth, glory, and phone numbers that will inevitably find their way to you if you can do it. I’ve already made it to 1,024. The clock is ticking.

Do some homework. The sad reality is that lunchtime can’t be as enjoyable now as it used to be, even with all these cheat codes, so you might as well make it productive. Anything completed at lunch doesn’t have to be later. What’s more valuable, 25 minutes of freetime at school or 25 minutes of freetime after school? The more time you have to yourself after school, the easier the semester becomes, so why sacrifice 1,500 seconds of the better half of your day for sitting silently in the cafeteria? Whip out your prehistoric laptop and knock out some Algebra II. Don’t you dare let Algebra II follow you home. Just make sure to give yourself enough time to eat.

Contemplate the futility of your situation. Lunch isn’t going to be pleasant for the rest of the school year, and even the next semester is uncertain. Kicking and screaming won’t turn back time or push it forward, so the only option is to wait it out. Understand and internalize the fact that we’re in this for the long haul, together, and the frustration will slowly deplete. And always remember, kids: time is an illusion and so is death.